How do i not let the emotional abuse of the past shape my future?

Its not been pretty my life, i hurt deeply by a woman who i loved with all my heart, there have been other things in my life that have hurt me deeply, i used to be so hopeful, i used to not look at people in a jaded way, i used to not look at life in a jaded way, i don't believe in love anymore, i don't believe in happiness, its been so illusive, women don't want a man like me, they want a man who isn't damaged and can talk about the weather for 3 hours straight and be happy about it, what am i meant to do? I want a wife, i want kids, i want a family with a picket fence and a job i can tolerate, i look ahead and all i see is nothingness.